Temper tantrums! We throw them when we don't get our way. We learned them as a child. Don't get what we want, we scream, holler, cry, demand, stamp and stomp until we prevail. Kids can be very dramatic in their antics and somewhat boisterous. As we age, we get more sophisticated in our temper tantrums. The antics change, but our heart actually darkens. Instead of just throwing a simple temper tantrum and being done with it, we hold onto it, nurture it, rehearse it again and again in our mind.
The longer we hold onto it, the deeper the bitterness and stronger the anger and animosity grows. It gets played out in passive aggression, continual confrontation, growing hatred, defensive attitudes, slanderous words and general frustration. It leads to road rage (even when we're not behind the wheel), tension, suspicion, sleepless nights and upset stomachs.
The solution? Get rid of it. That doesn't mean you get your revenge or demand an apology. Paul says you get rid of it by imitating God. This is one time you get to play God. And if you're gonna play God, you have to act like God by repaying malice with kindness, compassion, forgiveness and love. As Jesus hung on the cross and the crowd ridiculed Him, instead of blasting them into oblivion, He ask the Father to forgive them. His love kept Him on the cross.
My problem, when I play God, I have this tendency to come at it as judge, jury, and executioner. If it were me on the cross, I would have given them a taste of my power and caused them a little discomfort of their own. "Okay, I'm gonna endure this cross thing for you, but I wouldn't have to you know." Let them experience a little fear of God!
However, if I want to free myself, I've got to release the hurt and bitterness and anger. As long as we hold onto those feelings, we allow the other person and their actions to control us and our thoughts and influence our actions and affect all our relationships. It steals our joy of life.
Holding on also diminishes our relationship with God. It sucks the life out of our intimacy with Him. Instead of enjoying our time with God, we find ourselves whining and complaining all the time. It's hard for us to frolic in the love and grace of His forgiveness and mercy. Offering grace and forgiveness causes us to experience the fullness of God's forgiveness.
God, help me to be kind, compassionate, and forgiving like you. Thanks for your forgiveness and grace and mercy and love. Thank you Jesus for laying down your life for me.
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