She's out to get me! He's after my job! She's staring at me. Now what's he up to? My guess is that most of us have had those thoughts or even said those words to someone close to us. Is it paranoia, suspicion or reality? Could be a little of all three. Sometimes it's hard to determine the thoughts, motives and actions of others, especially if we have been burnt before. No matter the real intent, it causes us to feel insecure at best.
You would think that the greatest king of Israel would never have experienced such insecurity. But as you read through many of his psalms, you'll note that David experienced a great deal of mental anguish. His perception of potential or real enemies apparently caused him tremendous distress.
As you think of King David, it's hard to picture someone not liking him. A shepherd boy who plays the harp, slays giants and anointed by the prophet Samuel to be the next king. The young victorious warrior who defeats the enemy nations. The guy crowds hailed when he came to town, "Saul has slain his thousands, but David his tens of thousands." How could anyone have it in for David.
Let me point out a few things. Although the youngest of several brothers, David is the one picked to be king by Samuel. Not something his brothers took to kindly to. King Saul grew jealous of him over his popularity and tried to kill him several times. As he's running from Saul, David also has to watch out for the enemy nations, like the Philistines, who would like to see him dead. The first seven years of his reign, the northern 10 tribes out of 12 refused to acknowledge him has king over all Israel. His own wife ridiculed him over dancing before the Lord in nothing but an ephod when the ark of the covenant was brought back to Jerusalem. His kids were constantly fighting. His son, Absalom usurped his father's throne and causing David to flee. All this on top of the other nations constantly threatening his kingdom.
Did David has cause to be paranoid or at least suspicious? David hardly had a time when he wasn't dodging someone's attacks. No wonder he writes so many Psalms about being in duress. As you read those Psalms, a picture of David's heart and mind becomes clear. As successful as David was, not only did he have his detractors, he was at times overwhelmed in despair.
What David learned through all the eternal pressure and distress, was that the only one he could count on for strength, wisdom, protection, guidance, support, love was God. He realized his own weakness and inadequacy and rested in the only one who could sustain him, God.
God, I confess, I feel like David a lot. It seems like I'm facing some sort of attack every time I turn around. Just when things are looking positive, I get hit with something else. I need you, Lord, to be my strength, my refuge, my victory, my protector, my redeemer, my Savior and friend.
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